September 25, 2008

Financial stability

Many people stay in destructive relationships because they feel trapped and finance is one of the key reasons. I'm here to tell you, there is a solution to every problem. You don't have to stay anyplace you don't want to be because of fear. Living on your own is tough. I will be the first one to admit it. Most people are just afraid of the unknown. When you've been married to the same person forever, you dont think it can be done. It can! I walked away from a 7 year marriage with 2 children making $9 dollars an hour. Yes, in the beginning, my ex gave me $700 willingly, so it helped quite a bit. Then he decided not to do it anymore. I took him to court after filing for a divorce and was awarded $1300 a month. Karma is a bitch. That lasted a year. I guess the joke was on me. After that, I did it on my own. He went from job to job and finally left the state. I went from making $9 dollars an hour to $12 (which helped considerably) and have worked my way up from there. You learn to be creative.

My kids were young so name brand things weren't an issue until they became teenagers. Macaroni and Cheese was a regular cuisine in our house along with hamburger helper and a side salad. You make sacrifices for your happiness. I wasn't in a destructive relationship, we just fell out of love. However, many women are. One thing I truly believe is that you should always work and contribute to the household. By having someone support you, they have complete control. If things don't work out, where does that leave you? Better yet, go back to school and study a trade or get a degree. If your relationship shows the early signs that there may be trouble brewing on the horizon, don't wait. Start a plan and do your research. There are many agencies out there to help. These days, is anyone really financially stable? Some of us are more comfortable than others but there are no guarantees in life. What you have today can be gone in an instant. Don't let someone else dictate your destiny. We are only victims if we allow ourselves to be. Make the right decision for you and your kids, if you have them. Anyone can do it. You just need the will and the strength to believe in yourself. I'm a survivor. If I can do it, anyone can.....



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3 comments:

Yasmin said...

Kudos Lori on being a survivor...and karma is a beoytch...I hope your ex gets back every negative thing that he put into the universe.

Lori said...

Oh he is...and has been for years. Couldnt happen to a nicer guy;)

thecabinet said...

no gloating.....