November 2, 2007

Why do we stay?

Why do so many people stay in relationships that are either unhealthy or they aren’t happy?? We know its wrong, but we stay anyway. Some people will tell you it’s for the children. That is a theory I have never agreed with. I think children would be much happier with two parents living apart happily rather than together miserably. Infidelity, that word doesn’t even need anything else to accompany it in a sentence because it speaks for itself. How do you trust a man (or woman) after they have committed the ultimate crime against the relationship?? Believing them after that, to me, would be something that I could never do. And what if they do it over and over again?? A friend of mine stayed in a relationship with a man for almost 20 years and 3 children, when she knew he wasn’t loyal before they even got married. He was good looking and charming but why would you put yourself thru that?? When you’re with a man, you should feel safe and secure in your world. There should never be any doubt or mistrust when he tells you something, you should be able to believe him. And if he isn’t happy with what he has, why is he staying anyway?? Out of guilt?? How can you say you love someone and then have sex with someone else? A lot of people are blindsided, not even knowing there was a problem to begin with. And if he is the one that cheated, why would you beg him to take you back?? Do you have no self-esteem or self worth that you think this is what you deserve?? I know love is a very strong emotion. People do a lot of things in the name of love but is it worth it?? How can one person have so much control over your existence that you’re willing to do anything to have them in your world? Who are the biggest cheaters, men or women?? What you read and hear on TV always point the finger at the men. I think, women are just smarter and they don’t get caught. Men like to flaunt their triumphs, women do it for the satisfaction, not the notoriety. We like to feel desirable, and if the man you’re with doesn’t make you feel that way, it’s easy to stray to someone that does. Just my opinion, of course. Either way, I don’t justify or agree with straying outside a relationship. End it first than do what you want. It’s not fair to anyone involved if you stay married but have affairs on the side. If you ever loved the person you’re cheating on, show them the respect they deserve and do the right thing. Walk away. And if you’re the victim, you will survive. There are so many worthy people out there, to think that this is the end of your world is not reality. This too shall pass.

2 comments:

Rebecca said...

I agree, the worst crime in a relationship is infidelity. I've never been cheated on and I won't date someone if I know they've cheated before. Ever.

Anonymous said...

Well said...