Affairs in the workplace

Has your spouse or partner ever cheated on you with someone they work with? Its happened to me but I didn't find out until a year after the divorce. Its true, you spend more time with the people you work with than you do your loved ones, but is sleeping with one of them practical? First of all, what happens if it doesn't work? Not only could you lose your job, but imagine having to face that person on a regular basis. An affair is an affair, whether it be work related or not. And is it worth it? There are a million fish in the sea, would you really be willing to risk it all to get your rocks off? Is that person even someone you want a relationship with or are they just a piece of ass? Life is filled with choices. Its up to you to decide your fate. If you have a good thing now, why would you risk it? That's what I don't understand about affairs. You know what curiosity did to the cat, right?

When my marriage first started to show signs of distress, I had a feeling in my gut I couldnt shake. Its called women's intuition. Men can sense things too but its usually the women that figure it out first. Why? because we know how men think. And the funny thing is, women are just as deceptive as men. Sometimes better. I had an affair too with a coworker but it wasn't until there were problems at home. I wanted to see if I still had it. I did. Nothing became of it except it got really awkward to work with him. The thrill of getting away with something wasnt what it was cracked up to be. I ended up changing jobs. There is always going to be temptation but where is your heart? That's what really matters. If you're thinking about having an affair you need to think long and hard because if you are going to jeopardize what you have, maybe you shoulnt be there in the first place. If thats where your head is then get out before you do it. Show some respect for the person you once loved. Karma is a bitch.

Wordless "sleepy" Wednesday

Even a computer genius needs to sleep sometime.......

Octuplets born in Bellflower

How in the world does a women end up with 8 babies in her belly? And why would she want so many at one time? Usually, births of this kind are brought on by fertility medication, not in vitro fertilization. This can either be considered fertility medication gone wrong, or terribly right depending on how you look at it. She must have eaten like a horse. If you don't know the story I'm talking about, today in Los Angeles a woman gave birth to octuplets at Kaiser Permanente. 6 boys and 2 girls. There was only one other case of this happening and that was in Texas in 1998. One of the children in Texas ended up dying but the rest are now 10. Can you grasp the terrible two's times 8? Doctors seem optimistic about their survival rate. I think three of them are on vents.

OK, so you make it out of the hospital, now what? The cost to feed and diaper them alone is going to be a fortune. Should they get assistance? And if so, how is that fair to the rest of us that need help supporting our children even if there isn't 8 of them?One of the doctors suggested breast feeding (of course it was a male doctor). Now, that is something Id like to see. Can your body even produce that much milk? Two physicians who helped in the deliveries said they had planned in advance for the c-section deliveries but were only expecting seven babies. Oops!! Guess what? There's one more. Once you get to 7, what is one more baby to deliver anyway? All I can say about this ordeal is better her than me. How many players does it take to make a baseball team? Wow, I cant even imagine!!That poor woman will never sleep again.

Trust in fate

Are you resisting the possibility of the end of your relationship because you're afraid of what will happen? Hanging on to something that you really need to let go of? Being worried about something that might happen is a waste of energy. The more you resist the end of the relationship, the greater your fear can become. The more your fear increases, so does the chance of your fear coming true (or so they say). It's almost like willing it to come true because of your state of mind. Does that make sense? You become threatened and hang on even more. This in turn can push your partner further away. The fear that is holding on to you needs to be fed in order to create more power and control in your life so you need to do the opposite of resisting. You don't want to be perceived as needy. "What will be, will be" as my mother always said, along with "This too shall pass". You don't have to like it, and you don't have to sit around and do nothing. You just have to be willing to accept it. Letting go is strictly a state of mind. I know your heart is involved but you need to listen to your head too. The right state of mind can remove the anxiety and fear so that you can see what is happening and what needs to be done. Sometimes diversion thru hobbies, work, sports (whatever makes you happy), will keep your mind busy and help you to separate yourself enough to deal with what's happening a little at a time and to sort things out. Take it one day at a time but be real with yourself. What is the worst thing that could happen? Why have you become so dependent on someone else that the fear of being alone is controlling your life?

In your heart, be willing to lose your spouse. However, in your actions, do everything you can to create an environment where he or she would never want to leave, if that's what you really want. The moment you accept the situation and are willing to lose your partner, fear loses its power. The tunnel vision disappears and you become able to interact in a way that creates a loving and livable environment. To let go of your resistance and to restore your peace of mind, be willing for your life to be however it is and however it may become. Let go of your demands and expectations for how your life should be and make peace with the way your life is. Set yourself free inside. Then take whatever action you need to make yourself happy. If you and your partner want to work things out, that's great, if it doesn't work out that way, know that you will survive.

Running away from home

Many kids run away from home. Some of them use divorce as an excuse. They very is ages and financial back ground. Either way, they leave their parents at home to worry about their safe return. I had this happen to me with my oldest. He had gotten in with the wrong crowd at school and started making stupid mistakes. All of which affected the whole family (his brother and I). There is nothing like the worry of a parent. Kids don't realize what they put everyone thru because they are self absorbed. The problem with kids that go out on their own is that they feel that youthful invincibility. In other words, teenage runaways do not often realize what sort of dangers they may be susceptible to. If you are a parent who has a teen that has run away, there are some steps you can take to help bring them back and find some resolution:

1. The first thing to do is to call 911 as soon as you discover your teenager is missing. Many people believe there is a 24-48 hour waiting period before you can file a missing persons report. However, this is most definitely not the case, especially when it comes to minors.

2. When calling, be prepared to report your teens name, date of birth, height, weight, identifying features such as glasses, braces, piercings, etc., and the clothes you last saw him or her wearing.

3. If you feel your teen is about to runaway, or has recently returned from a few days away, consider suggesting counseling or a family meeting on his or her terms. Your teenager may simply need someone to listen and understand his or her thoughts and feelings.

Remember when you were a kid? I thought, not only could I conquer the world, but that my parents were stupid and didn't understand. I have always tried to keep an open relationship with my boys. I wanted them to be able to tell me anything. The trick to that is, you cant react when they do. I mean, get upset. I had a hard time with this. My son would filter what he told me so I only got a dim picture of the true situation. It wasn't until I got on his Myspace and realized what was going on. Then, I checked out his girlfriend and all of his friends. Its amazing how much I learned. The bad thing is, if they have it in their mind that they are going to do something, chances are they probably will. Your best plan of action is the way you handle it. Its funny, even when my son ran away, he still called to tell me where he was. The drugs and alcohol distorted his way of thinking but not to the extent that he didn't want to worry me. That's when I knew there was hope. Listen to your child and be aware of their actions. The teenage years are hard. The good thing is, the majority of us make it thru with only minor scar's. Don't wait to do something. If you feel your child has run away, act on it. I would rather overreact than have something happen to my child.

Infomercials

You see them time and time again, especially on the weekends. What are they? Infomercials. Ive talked in the past about my experience with Sheer Cover Make up and what a rip off it was. They had an introductory offer of $9.95 to try their make up, so I ordered it. When I received it there was a bill attached for $116.00 dollars for my shipment. When I called and spoke to someone at the company, she said that she knows it says $9.95 but that is was not true. Since the order wasn't shipped from their warehouse, they didn't offer that special and that she was sorry it didn't state the actual amount. She then tried to sell me another kit for $29.95. I was told I had 30 days to try it and send it back before the next payment of $30.00 dollars was charged to my account. Needless to say, they got their make up back, and I finally got my money back minus the shipment price. I also tried proactive. I didn't buy it from TV, I purchased it in the mall. What I got was over priced acne treatment that didn't work. I think I ended up paying $75 dollars in total. All I really needed to do was change my diet and drink water. Go figure!

How do they get away with it? Recently DBF Michael and I attended a Direct Buy open house. We heard good things about it so decided to see what they had to offer. First, we sat thru 2 TV infomercials telling us how wonderful their company was, then we had to listen to a salesman tell us how much money we were going to save. 45 minutes later, he decided to give us the bottom line before showing us yet one more video. They wanted us to pay almost $5000.00 dollars for a membership to their warehouse so we could save money. Not to mention, a yearly fee to stay a member. Wait, let me get this straight. I have to pay them $5000.00 dollars to save $500 on a washing machine? Needless to say, we walked out. They have websites designed to tell you the scam artists from the legitimate companies. I suggest researching any product you buy from any infomercial. I have come to the conclusion that if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Don't be fooled.

Lets talk about dating

When you are a single Mom or Dad, it's important for you to realize that you are more than just a parent. You are a person who has needs like any normal human and who deserves to have a social life. To help make the transition from Mommy or Daddy to date, lover, boyfriend or girlfriend, stop thinking of yourself as just a parent, and start thinking of yourself as an attractive, sexy single person. Take more care with your appearance than you might be in the habit of doing. When you're out doing errands on the weekend, wear something that flatters you, even if it's just a pair of great-looking jeans, instead of wearing cutoffs or sweats. Think about having a makeover or try a different haircut. Updating your wardrobe is also a good way to feel more attractive, desirable, and sexy. If you're still wearing a wedding ring, take it off now. In fact, shed any rings that would convey the message that you're unavailable.

I know how important it is to take care of your children by meeting their needs, but if you don't take care of yourself, you won't be able to take care of them. Look at it like an oxygen mask. Parents should always breathe into it first before dealing with their children and the struggles that come with everyday living. The theory is that if you don't get enough oxygen, you'll be unable to help your kids. Oxygen can include, but not be limited to: sex, sex, friendship, sex, did I mention sex? or just someone to have dinner with once a week. Whatever it is, don’t let it take a back seat in your life. It’s amazing how good you feel when you take care of your needs as well as your children’s. Have you ever heard the saying, “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy?” There is definitely a lot of truth to that. Don’t wait, just do it.

Wordless "Achmed" Wednesday

Guess who we seen last weekend???

The more you have it, the more you want it?

If those of you haven't figured out what I'm talking about, its sex. I have heard multiple people in different areas say that the more sex you have, the more sex you want. Also, when someone has a lot of sex, they submit some sort of aura or sent that makes them more desirable. Is that true? I have never lacked in the desire for sex, although time and exhaustion have played a factor over actually following thru with the pursuit on occasion. Is it true that a woman hits her sexual peek at 40 and a man at 18? That doesn’t seem fair. Almost like the Universe has played a practical joke on us all. I believe that some people are born more sexual that others. Men don’t corner the market in this arena. Women can be just as sexual.

If you are in a relationship and find yourself starved for affection, here are some pointers to help get your significant other in the mood:

Baby your partner for a while. Sometimes all women really need is to feel loved and desired and its no different for men.

Offer her/him a quick massage, nothing fancy or too long, just a brief rub down. It’s amazing how erotic that can become.

Don’t forget the romance. Who cares if you've been together forever why should that change anything?

Wear something that makes you feel sexy...this is for guys too. And women love a man that smells good. That’s a total turn on for me. Feeling sexy will make you want to have sex. You can go from a lady that feels bleak, to a freak in the sheets.

And to those who of you who are the one with the lack of desire. I suggest doing it even if you don’t want to. I know that’s hard and sometimes really out of the question but in the end, you really will feel better. Not to mention, it brings you closer together.

Sex isn’t supposed to be a chore, it was designed as a win/win situation. Of course, that can all depend on your partner too. Just have fun with it and remember to think about your partner on a daily basis. What can you do to show them you care? Let them know you want them. A woman that feels sexy will be sexy, with an emphasis on the SEX part. Remember that.

PMS...

Every month, year after year, women have to deal with PMS. Some women more than others. I tend to fall more under the some women rather than the others. This is a time when a usually very logical, realistic, somewhat level headed person becomes a crying, unrealistic, lunatic. It was worse while I was taking birth control pills. I would have to say intensified by 10. Now, I find myself crying mid month when I'm ovulating. Nothing seems to go right, or fit right, or feel right. It isn't fair. Then, you have to deal with stupid people and it makes it even worse. Don't they know they're stupid? The crap that is coming out of their mouth makes no sense and Id like to drop kick them off the nearest cliff. Of course, these are things I'm thinking only to myself. We wouldn't want anyone calling the doctors in white coats to haul Lori away because she is about to go postal (figure of speech).

The thing I hate the most is not being about to control my emotions. I go from sensitive too ultra-mega-mondo sensitive psycho woman in sixty seconds flat. If men only knew what we go thru, it might help them to understand us better. Now that's a visual that really made me laugh out loud. Can you imagine seeing a bunch of irrational men walking around bloated and crying when you tell them something isn't right? What really freaks me out is the thought of what menopause will be like. Will I have PMS 24/7 only with hot flashes?? God I hope not. Something happened at work that on any normal day would have either made me laugh or piss me off. That day, however, it made me cry all the way home. Stupid. Why do I let people get the best of me? Have you ever heard of being reprimanded for kissing your boyfriend in the parking lot outside of your work? (I don't do PDA, it was a few pecks on the lips and hugging). No, me either. I figure, if they have time to sit around and watch what other people do on their breaks they either 1.) need to get a life, or 2). definitely don't have enough work to do. I'm not going to let this get to me. I'm going to do what my mother says and consider the source. I refuse to let this ruin my night but I have to wonder, would I have even given this a second thought if it wasn't for the time of the month it happened? Enquiring minds want to know........

Ever get tired of being the responsible one?

You're the one the makes everything alright. You have to, you're the Mom. Do you ever get tired of being the responsible one? When I left my ex husband, my kids were 1 and 4. I knew it was going to be a struggle but it was something that had to be done. I packed my kids up, took my belongings, and left my husband while only making 9.50 an hour. In the beginning, he gave money willingly. In the end, I had to fight for it. Almost 10 years went by without a steady child support check and my inner strength grew stronger. I was there thru the colds, fevers, stitches, and broken bones. I made sure the boogie man was gone before bed, changed sheets in the middle of the night when my oldest couldn't stop wetting the bed. I fought the school system when they said my youngest had problems. He did, its called ADHD. That didn't make him retarded, it made him a challenge. Into the teenage years, I was the one that waited up night after night for a teen who chose to be rebellious at the age of 15. I dealt with the drugs, alcohol, ditching school, running away, and problems with the law. I have always been the responsible one because I chose to have these children. It was a decision we made as a couple and he skipped out on his half of the deal. It happens. Life goes on.

My ex husbands excuse for not being there when my boys needed him was that he had a drug problem. The kids still needed to eat, its a good thing I wasnt filled with excuses. It wasn't his fault he couldn't hold down a job, it wasn't his fault he left the state and didn't have contact with the boys for over a year. It wasn't his fault he owed over $50,000 in back child support, nor was it his fault he chose a woman over his kids. Who's fault was it then? For so many years I battled the anger I had inside towards him. Then I reached a point in my life that it just didn't matter anymore. Sure, I got tired of always having to deal with things on my own but it made me stronger. If I had it to do over again would I change anything? Not much. Would I want to have been the irresponsible one and lived free without guilt? No way. Times have changed and the boys have grown up. My ex now lives in a world of regret that he can never change. I guess mothers are put in their role for a reason. To love and protect our children. Do we miss out on life because we are at home raising kids as single parents? Absolutely not. When I look at my kids now, I have so much pride in the job that I did, I wouldn't have it any other way. No need to worry boys, Mama's got your back!

The Dreaded Plateau

As many of you know, Ive been on the nutrisystems diet since October of last year. To date, Ive lost 31 pounds. What happens when you reach a plateau? I have tried everything to break this dreaded spell and its doing nothing but frustrate me. Although, Id like to say I went window shopping the other day. I fit in a size that I never dreamed Id get into again. Everything looked good. We are going to Ramsay's restaurant for Valentines Day do I wanted to pick up something nice. There was so much to choose from, I felt like a kid in a candy store. I swore I wouldn't buy anything new until I reached my goal but the size I am in is 4 sizes smaller than when I started the diet. I felt a sense of pride in what I have achieved so far. It hasn't been easy, especially thru the holidays but I did it. I just cant figure out how to drop the next 30. Ive done some research and it stated that If your weight loss has stalled, don't give into the temptation to quit or worse, to try more extreme measures that aren't good for your health, such as skipping meals or working out excessively. I admit, I tried eating less to see if it would work. No such luck. However, A weight plateau is no reason to give up on a healthy plan. Maybe I need to take a moment to regroup, shift the focus away from my weight for a while, and consider other ways to measure my progress. As a matter of fact, trying on those new clothes did just that. Everything I have is so big, its really hard to tell how far you've come when you're not wearing things that fit.

They say plateaus are natural and occur because your body constantly strives to maintain equilibrium. Its just a matter of being patient and trying to mix it up a bit. I must confess, with it getting dark so early I'm not getting the exercise I should to help me along. I just want to reach my goal weight!! Why must my body be so stubborn? I guess I wont burn any calories complaining about it. If anyone has any suggestions though, besides the obvious, Id really love to hear your feedback.

Mercury in retrograde

Have you felt that things weren’t quite right recently? Communication is off with your loved ones, that check hasn’t came in the mail, your thoughts aren’t really clear? What does that mean? Mercury is in retrograde. In general, Mercury rules thinking and perception, processing and disseminating information and all means of communication, commerce, education and transportation. Mercury retrograde gives rise to personal misunderstandings; flawed, disrupted, or delayed communications, negotiations and trade; glitches and breakdowns with phones, computers, cars, buses, and trains. And all of these problems usually arise because some crucial piece of information, or component, has gone astray or awry. It is therefore not wise to make important decisions while Mercury is retrograde, since it is very likely that these decisions will be clouded by misinformation, poor communication and careless thinking. Mercury is all about mental clarity and the power of the mind, so when Mercury is retrograde these intellectual characteristics tend to be less acute than usual, as the critical faculties are dimmed. Make sure you pay attention to the small print! Mercury's retro phase tends to bring unforeseen changes and blockages, but the aggravation and frustration that many of us experience during these periods is often due to our own inability to roll with the punches. Is this due to our ego-fixation? Mercury sets out to restructure our thinking processes and for many of us this is painful and frustrating. Moreover, these experiences reveal flaws in our internal organization as well as our external planning, which can make us feel foolish and inadequate.

I know alot of you are skeptical about this but think about it. It began on 1/11. How have things been in your life since then? I know personally, this explains alot. Thank God it will be over by Valentine's Day because life can get really exhausting during this time. Just be patient. Its going to happen 3 times this year, which means you're gonna have to take the trials you are going thru with a grain of salt. This too shall pass.

Non Profit Organizations

A friend of mine is going into a venture that will save life's. She is setting up transitional housing for emancipated foster youths. The ages are from 18-24 and they have been emancipated from the child welfare system. The goal of the program is to provide a safe living environment while helping them achieve self-sufficiency so that they can learn life skills upon leaving the foster care support system. The have two homes they have purchased for these kids, and I say kids because I'm 42. To me, they are still children. The State will fund 100 percent of the non federal portion of the rate through the Transitional Housing for Foster Youth Fund. The 60 percent county match of the non federal portion has been eliminated. Her main issue is how to get started. Where do you go for volunteers? How do you get sponsors for the portion the government doesn't pick up? There are so many kids that are thrown into the world with no guidance and end up in the jail system, rehab, or living on the streets. What an awesome way to step up and show some love. The houses are in the Southern California area of Fontana and Rialto. She is an inspiration to all who know her, which is why I know this program will work. However, this is a first for her so she needs some further education on setting up the home and where to go for answers.

Does anyone have any experience in this type of industry? Anything you know about this topic would be helpful and appreciated. Also, if you live in this area and are interested in volunteering, please e-mail me. The link to my e-mail is on my blog.

Another year with Supportkids

Here we go again. One year down, how many more to go before they terminate my contract? Never? This is one of the most frustrating things I have to deal with on a yearly basis. I have sent numerous requests for termination and still they refuse. They have collected over 30,000 dollars for themselves off of my child support. Can you believe that? No one has successfully been able to put this company out of business. They sucker people in on a daily basis then rip you off. 34% of child support is what they collect every other week, month after month. You hear this same scenario played over and over again by desperate parents wanting out. How do they get away with this? Am I being unappreciative of their services? Should I feel privileged that they get my money from the DA, take their cut, and issue a check for the leftovers? I feel bad for all of the single parents trying to make ends meet who venture into the lifelong partnership with Supportkids. If they could only read my blog first before signing, it would save them alot of headache.

I signed a contract with them because my ex left the state. After numerous years of trying to collect on my own thru the DA's office, I seen a commercial on TV so decided to call. Its funny, new customers get a toll free number while existing victims have to dial direct and pay the charges. You would think with the amount of money that company collects, they could at least pay for my call. After over 30,000 dollars, I think Ive earned it. It doesn't matter what you do or say, they don't care. The law is on Supportkids side. The number one response, you should have never signed the contract. If the DA's office was doing what they are paid to do, I would have never had to hire those crooks. I understand that the child support division is broken. The number of dead beat sperm donors and unfit mothers is increasing at an alarming rate but nothing is being done. What is a single parent supposed to do? I have yet to answer that question but I do have some very important advise. For those of you considering hiring Supportkids, don't do it! If you look at the comments left on my personal blog under the Supportkids topic, you will see that I am not the only one fed up with this conspiracy. There has got to be another another way to resolve this issue without being ripped off. Learn by my mistake.

Wordless Wednesday

My Favorite!

An increase for divorce in January

Did you know that January has the highest rate for divorce? As a matter of fact, 50% higher than any other time of the year. Most people want to hold tight thru the holidays so they wait until they are over to file. I can see why that make sense. No one wants to disturb the family no matter how miserable you are. Not to mention, all the questions that would be asked from friends and relatives. That could get uncomfortable. By this time next year, the divorce will be final and there will be no questions asked as its all been said and done. I never thought of divorce as a New Years Resolution but I guess It works for some. The experts also say the divorce rate drops between Thanksgiving and New Years day. That wasnt true in my case, I left my first husband the day after Thanksgiving. We didn't have children together. That probably made a big difference.

Divorce can be tough no matter who you are or what time of the year it is. I would think you might want to wait until after Valentines Day too, but who am I? Of course, if you cant stand your partner, a dozen roses wont do you any good. I can see why January would be a good time to file. You want to start a clean slate into a new life, new year, new you. That doesn't happen over night though. First you file, then they're served, next comes court and if all goes well, you're free 6 months later. That gives you a few months to heal before the holidays start all over again. In reality, the vows you take should state "until death or divorce do us part." I think the older you get married, the better chance it has for survival. Especially if you've been married before. Why? You think twice before doing it again. Although some people make it a habit, the majority of us don't like divorce court. Marriage isn't easy and neither are relationships. In the end, we are all just trying to find the happily ever after. I believe you should love like you've never been hurt. Easier said than done? That gets harder as you get older too. What are we to do?

New Years Resolutions

As most of you know, I started my New Years resolution back in October. That's when I began the Nutrisystems diet, which was just in time for the holidays. I'm not going to lie, it hasn't been easy but the results are what really count. What is it that say???"Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." And its true. I was surrounded by cookies, candy, potluck meals, Thanksgiving and Christmas feasts and I still made the right choices. I think its all about choices and you have to be right mentally for this to work. Once you've reached the point that you are tired of the way you look, it's time to do something about it. In my case, Divorce 360 got me started and I continued with the program. Every year people start New Years resolutions and by February, they have given up. I think calling it a resolution is almost a set up for failure. How many people actually succeed when they start anything new at the beginning of the year?

One of my biggest inspirations is watching the Biggest Loser. Every week I see those people exercise and eat right, in the end, they have massive results. During the show, they give you tips to help you make the right choices. Its a win-win situation. I originally gained my weight when I got pregnant the first time. That was almost 21 years ago. I only got down close to my starting weight once in that time. I ended up gaining it back because I had no support system with the man that was in my life at the time. He was very jealous and possessive. Having other men look at me drove him crazy. So, I gained it all back and then some. Anyone can change. You have to be ready because if you're not, you will never win. I feel so much better about myself and its made me a happier person.

I encourage anyone that is debating whether they should either try Nutrisystems or lose weight in general, make sure your mind is in the right place. Diets are meant to be followed and if you cheat, you're right back to square one. Who are you hurting with that anyway? No one but yourself. I have been an inspiration to some and that makes me feel good. Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do today. If I can do it, anyone can! By the way, I'm down 30 pounds in 3 months. It works.

Time for guilty pleasures.....

My guilty pleasure confession for the week is that I absolutely LOVE to go to the movies. I have been taking my kids to the show ever since my youngest could sit in the seat by himself. His little feet didn't even reach the end of the chair. There is something about eating popcorn with hot tamales, while drinking an over sized beverage that makes my heart pitter-patter. I love all kinds of movies but scary flicks are my favorite. The problem is, my tolerance level is pretty high. Not many movies have the ability to scare me that easily. The ones that are true stories usually do it better than any slasher film. I like comedies and romances too. Lets not forget action and animation as Finding Nemo was one of my all time favorite films along with Monsters, Inc.

My mother never took us to the show as kids. I don't even think she goes that often now. However, I picked up a love for cinema and have passed it on to my children. I rarely go after matinee prices these days because the cost is ridiculous. BTW, we ventured out last weekend to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button...WOW!!! What a great movie. I suggest you get the small drink for this one because you're gonna be in there a while. Brad Pitt did an awesome job. The film was well written and its a beautiful story. If you have about 3 hours of time to spend on a Saturday afternoon, go and see it. On the flip side, 7 pounds was quite the opposite. We spent an hour and a half not knowing what in the heck was going on. Id definitely wait for the DVD. I love Will Smith but even he couldn't save this film. I think my calling in life was to be a movie critic. I wonder what you have to do to get a job like that because the critics they have now suck. Don't ever read their reviews, research what the viewers have to say then go with the majority. Wanna go to the movies??? YOU BETCHA!!!

Check into Cash....beware!

With the holidays behind us, I wanted to pass on some information to those of you struggling to pay your past due bills. About 10 years ago, I was having a hard time making ends meet. I was constantly stealing from Peter to pay Paul and I wanted a quick way out. I heard about a place that would lend you money and you didn't have to pay them back until you got paid. So I did it. Again, and again, and again. Then, I heard of other companies offering the same assistance so I signed up with them too. It was three companies total. One wasn't enough because when I would go back in to pay them off, I somehow ended up falling short every time and needed to readvance. At one point, I was paying 45 x3 (135) every two weeks. Times that by twice a month. The bottom line, I was paying out $270 dollars in finance charges everymonth. The interest rate on their loans is off the charts. I did that for five years. That breaks down to $16,200 dollars. I put myself into debt so bad, I didn't know how I was ever going to get out.

Those companies are not designed to help people. They are designed to make money. You see the same people week after week, month after month, year after year going in to buy back their checks and readvance because there is no other alternative. Check into cash and payday advance will even cash your Welfare and Social Security checks. They have no conscience. I know it may seem like a quick fix to a money problem, but in the end its not. I don't care how far behind you are, there has got to be a better answer than this. Companies will work with you if you send them what you can, as long as you send them something. You can buy groceries at the 99 cent store if you have to or collect bottles and cans to recycle. Clip coupons and watch the sale ads. As the voice of experience, its not as easy to get out as they make it seem. My mother bailed me out once, but after a few months, I ended up in the same boat. An ex boyfriend bailed me out the second time and that was it for me. I havent been back. I wish there was a way to paint a warning sign on the entrance so that people will know what they are getting themselves into before they step thru the door. They have contracts with a bunch of fine print that makes everything seem so simple, but what it doesnt say that they feed off of desperate people. Please, don't get suckered in to their scam. Its the worst thing you could ever do. Trust me.

Wordless Wednesday

This is my son, who is currently stationed in Iraq. I wonder what he is thinking about??

Are bad boys really bad for you?

Why are most women attracted to the motorcycle types, who happen to be dirty and grungy looking men that their mothers and fathers have told them not to get involved with? Is it because of these men’s inherently good looks, or their bad boy quality? Maybe its a simple case of bad psychology because women really don't know what’s good for them. Ya, could be. Believe it or not, there is a certain aura that bad boys exude that some women find hopelessly irresistible. I am one of them. Women love the little bad things found in men. It makes them a challenge. Some simply love the drama. A relationship with bad boys gets most women’s juices flowing. A date with them is unpredictable. One minute they may be out on a nice cozy dinner, the next minute they may be in a dark street corner making out. Meanwhile, a date with a clean cut man could be nice, simple, conventional and unsurprising. What follows after a quiet dinner may be a talk, and then some more talk, and a walk. Comfortable, safe and sometimes it might even be romantic. Although some find such a scenario boring.

Every woman has a preference in men. Some like them tall, short, stocky, sweet, funny, bald, long hair, whatever. It takes all kinds. I have always been attracted to bad boys. Does that make them bad for you? I guess it all depends on how bad they really are. I like them to look bad but not to actually be "bad". I love long hair but it doesn't suit all men. My kids think its funny because they are both clean cut and Ive always made sure their hair was trimmed short. That's different though, they are my kids. There is something about a man in black with long hair that makes me gitty inside. Add a sense of humor and the ability to treat a woman like a lady and I am set. Will I think that in 10 years? Who knows. Ive been attracted to the same type of guy all my life. I have dated clean cut men. There is nothing wrong with that but a man in a suit does nothing for me unless its my man. Although, just because a mans clean cut and wears a suit doesn't make him good. Look at all the politicians that have cheated on their wives. My conclusion, you cant judge a book by its cover. You need to read a few pages before you know if your interested. Does that make sense?

Inspiring Blogger/You Make My Day Award

Jes was so sweet to give me this award. It's great to know that I have made a difference in someone's day and life. That makes it all worth it. I feel like my fellow bloggers are my extended family and I love knowing you are all just a click away. Thank you so much Jes...YOU made my day!

What are your hopes for the coming year?

With the new year comes hopes and dreams for a brighter future. Isn't it funny as the clock strikes 12, how you feel a new found hope that wasn't there a day ago? Its like the slate has been washed clean and everything is fresh and new. What are your hopes for 2009? I know 2008 has been a tough year. Some have had it rougher than others. With the economy the way it is and unemployment at an all time high, we can all use a boost. Soon, there will be a new president sworn into office. Will he be a miracle worker? I don't think so but I hope he does a better job than what we have had in office for the past 8 years. I have never seen the employment section in the Newspaper only take up an inch of space. Whats going on? How are we ever going to pull out of this? Maybe all we need is faith. That is what has gotten people thru tough times for centuries. I believe that everything happens for a reason and we are where we are because that's how its supposed to be. However, that doesn't make it any easier.

In 2009 I hope that people will no longer be in fear of losing their homes, that the stock market will do a complete 180, and that people who are unemployed will finally get the job of their dreams. Lets face it, life is tough. Change is even tougher but it can be done. We need to put back in to our economy so that we will all succeed. My son is graduating in June, what does his future hold? Will he be able to go out into the world and find a job so he can survive? Not at this rate. Millions of kids graduate every year and what do they have waiting for them? Even people with college educations cant find jobs. It makes me sad but I haven't lost hope. Our country has pulled itself out of worse situations in the past. By the way, why aren't banks lending money these days? Isn't that what the bail out was for? If everyone has the same mentality as the lenders, this economy is in dire strait for the long haul. 2008 wasn't a bad year for me. Lord knows I have had alot worse but I hope that this coming year will be a great one for everyone. Now, lets get this party started and dont look back. We all have a brighter future...I can feel it!